10 Steps to Create a Meaningful Life
Dear Advisors,
Many advisors I know maintain a cool distance and an air of inaccessibility. Our culture tells us that it adds to our professional demeanor. Our image of prestige becomes a “wow factor” for many prospective clients, and even our employees. We believe that if we are too relatable, authentic, or emotional, then our credentials, financial expertise, and our ability to lead our team come into question. Having the courage to be vulnerable and authentic is one of our greatest strengths as a financial advisor. For example:
As advisors, we have to be comfortable with vulnerability to help our clients see beyond the dollars. We need to sit on the same side of the table, help them peel back the layers, and discover what it means for them to live wholeheartedly. Being vulnerable with your clients means that you don’t have to adhere to artificial standards of perfection. You can be honest without feeling guilty when a client isn’t a good fit for you, and enjoy working with your best clients so much more!
If you don’t have a culture of vulnerability in your office, you probably have employees who are ‘artificially happy’ at work, but not actually engaged or able to provide real feedback. Replace a management style based on shame with one based on valuing vulnerability. Stop saying that “failure is not an option.” You’ll start to see employees share a love for learning, creativity, and innovation. That type of culture makes your company much more valuable.
Now think about how vulnerability impacts your family. Forgiving yourself for not being the perfect parent allows you to enjoy the time you have with your kids. Opening up to your life partner about your struggles and weaknesses allows you to support each other and fight through it together. Admitting when you need help provides an opportunity for you to learn and grow together, whether that’s seeing a marriage counselor or hiring your own financial advisor. It’s about valuing your relationship more than your image.
Getting vulnerable is extremely uncomfortable. It’s often associated with shame and judgement. But the result is deeper, stronger relationships, and a courageous, meaningful life! Now that we understand how valuable vulnerability is, how do we do it? In her new book, Daring Greatly, Brené Brown outlines 10 Guideposts to Wholehearted Living:
Cultivate Authenticity - let go of what people think
Cultivate Self-Compassion - let go of perfectionism
Cultivate a Resilient Spirit - let go of numbing tactics and playing the victim
Cultivate Gratitude and Joy - let go of scarcity and fear
Cultivate Intuition and Faith - let go of the need for certainty
Cultivate Creativity - let go of comparison
Cultivate Play and Rest - let go of exhaustion as a status symbol and productivity as self-worth
Cultivate Calm and Stillness - let go of anxiety and busy-ness as a lifestyle
Cultivate Meaningful Work - let go of self-doubt and “supposed to”
Cultivate Laughter, Song, and Dance - let go of being cool and “always in control”
As a financial advisor, I love having the designations after my name! That alphabet soup is my suit of armor. While what we know matters, who we are matters more. Being vulnerable and authentic makes me a better financial advisor, a better spouse, and a happier person. If you’re interested in learning more about Brené Brown, please visit her website here. I hope you can take steps towards being vulnerable with your clients, employees, and family. It will multiply the value of your business and help you lead a truly meaningful life!
Warm regards,
Brooklyn
P.S.
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